1984 September/October issue Part 4

Questions and Answers

Could you mention some things you think are important about raising children?

First, and of primary importance, remember what God commanded Israel: "You shall take these words of mine to hear and keep them in mind....... Teach them to your children, and speak of them indoors and out of doors, when you lie down and when you rise. Write them up on the door posts of your houses." �Dt 11:18 20) My daughter Valerie began reading the psalms aloud to her son Walter on the day she brought him home from the hospital. We do not know when a child begins to absorb what is important to his parents, but wouldn't it be lovely if his first memory is of hearing the Bible read to him? The priorities set by his father and mother make a huge difference in a child's thinking. "Give us a child until he is seven," says the Catholic Church, and we will have him for life." My parents read Scripture aloud to us morning and evening with the

family gathered together, and individually when we were put to bed. They took turns putting us to bed at night when we were small, and always prayed with us when they tucked us in. When we went for walks with our father on Saturday afternoons, he taught us to observe things-birds, flowers, ferns, acorns, brooks, squirrels. He often quoted Scripture to us, imitated the songs of birds, quizzed us on what we saw, helped us look through his binoculars. So- the second suggestion I would make is to teach your children to observe. Television will not help much with this. They must learn to see firsthand. Third: Give them work to do, even when very small. Show them that everybody in the family has work to do for the good of the family. Besides routine work such as picking up clothes and toys, helping to put away dishes and laundry, picking up sticks in the yard, weeding the garden, etc., try to provide optional jobs which a child may do to earn money also. This can begin by the time he is five or six, and should be clearly distinguished from the other work, lest he begin to expect payment for his routine jobs. It is a good thing for him to learn early what the price of an ice-cream cone, for example, represents in terms of money earned. Fourth: All time spent with mother or father will be "quality time" if the child knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is loved and enjoyed. Hug him, compliment him for kindness shown to a brother or sister, for work well done, for cheerfulness and thoughtfulness. Tell him he looks nice, his room is neat. Let him know that you see him as a gift from God and are grateful for him. This will help him to understand, also, that his parents are God's gift to him, and he can learn to be thankful for the things money can't buy.